You shouldn’t just make it aparent to others that you are important and valid either; you should matter to you, too.
Number one on your self care to-do list should be making yourself feel loved, and only you know how to do that best. So instead of pining for the day that your true love buys that necklace in the window, or wishing someone would show up on your doorstep with a bunch of flowers and a big box of chocolates this Valentine’s Day—Girl, you go do that for you. A good friend told me: “Dating yourself should be like dating another person” you are in a relationship with yourself; it’s one of the most important relationships you’ll ever have.
So how is that done? Well, what do you need from you? Is it to feel like you’re that special someone? Do you need a break? Do you need something tasty to eat? Do you need to feel pretty?
Here’s some inspiration:
1. Take Yourself Out to Eat
There’s a great big list of things you can do alone, and eating is one of them. Eating in public seems shameful. I know that feeling: walking into a restaurant and asking for a table for one and pulling out your book to read while you wait to eat alone, as everyone stares at you and the server gives you an apologetic look like they just feel so bad that you’re alone. But it’s not. There are so many great things about going out to eat by yourself(especially if you’re an introvert like me) You don’t have to keep a conversation going, you don’t have to worry if there is food in your teeth, you don’t have to worry about bad breath at the end of the night, and you can shamelessly play on your phone all night long, completely oblivious to the rest of the world while enjoying your solo meal immensely.
And sure, if you’re in a relationship, you might hardly find yourself in this situation. However, if you do, I highly reccomend it; it’s the most peaceful restaurant meal you’ll ever experience.
If you’re currently single, just do it. You do not need someone to take you out to eat, you do not need to invite anyone to dinner with you in order to eat at your favorite restaurant, and you don’t have to order doordash to avoid dining alone. Dine alone. It’s okay. I promise.
2. Buy Yourself the Damn Flowers
Six years ago, when I was just a young and inspired teenager, starting my first job at McDonald’s, a married coworker said, sadly, “I only get flowers twice a year; once on my birthday, and once on Valentine’s Day.” She clearly wanted more than two flower bouquets a year. She clearly loved recieving flowers. She clearly believed that she was worth more than two flower bouquets a year, and it made her sad.
My advice: go buy yourself some flowers. Not as a “Well if you wont, then I will.” but do it because you want them. Do it as a kind gesture towards yourself.
And if you’re not currently in a relationship—just buy the damn flowers. Don’t stare ongingly at the bouquet of your favorite flowers and wish with all your heart that a mysterious and handsome figure will appear to shower you with roses(honestly, you could pick a better flower to dream about too) reach your hand out, grasp the bouquet with purpose, stride confidently toward the self check-out, and buy the damn flowers. Just because you want to. You don’t have to wait for a romantic gesture to recieve something pretty.
3. Go See a Movie
This seems just as scary as number one because—who goes to the movies alone? Somebody who’d like some quality “me” time, thankyouverymuch.
In my opinion, of all the date ideas, this one belongs on the solo date idea list the very most. The very first time I went to see a movie by myself, I was so nervous about what other people would think of me being alone. Let me tell you something very important: nobody actually cares what you’re doing. It was the best movie theatre experince I’ve ever had, to date. My absolute biggest pet peave is when someone tries to talk to me while I’m watching a movie, or even a video on YouTube; going to the movies alone is complete bliss. Also, no need to have that awkward conversation about drinks and popcorn, because you’re obviously buying.
Again, don’t wait for someone to take you out to see that movie you’ve been dying to see. Take yourself to the movies. Easy as that.
4. Watch the Sunset
Watching the sunset alone is almost unheard of. It’s so unromantic. But actually, it leaves lots of room for your to think uninterupted as you gaze at the changing colors of the sky, and perhaps take time to write in your journal. You do not have to wait for a relationship to experince beautiful things. Watching the sunset doesn’t have to be romantic. watching the sunset is something that should be done by anyone and everyone. It’s peaceful, thought provoking, and inspiring. Couples aren’t the only people who should experince these feelings.
I know the bolded words say “watch the sunset” but know that you are allowed to do so much more on your own. Go see beautiful places. Go enjoy the great outdoors. DOn’t wait around for a partner to experience the Earth and all of her sunsets and sunrises.
5. Do Something Kind For Yourself
You don’t have to take yourself out to date you. Stay in. Set up the best bath in the history of baths; complete with bath bombs, face masks, candles, body scrubs, essential oils, a favorite drink, soft music, flower petals, expensive chocolates, and a delicious snack(obviously a cheese board, because that’s how queens do it)
Stop waiting. If you’re in a realtionship, don’t wait around for that one day that someone sets up a romantic bath scene for you to come home to after a long day at work. If you’re currently single, never use the “I can’t wait until I’m in a realtionship and they…” mentallity. Just do things for yourself.
write yourself a love note and tuck it away in a favorite book to surprise yourself.
Buy your favorite ice cream on the way home from work, because you had a long day.
Ignore all the chores and curl up with a good book, or a binge-worthy show.
Write down everything you love about yourself.
Treat yourself to a spa day.
Buy that outfit your’ve been eyeing for months.
Just do things for yourself. You deserve it. You try so hard every day, and you really appreciate it, so tell yourself so and run a bath.
I promise I wouldn’t write any of this without some knowledge of it myself. I’ve done every single on of these things listed, and I’ve loved myself even more for it. Spending quality time with loved ones improves your realtionship with them—stop forgetting your most beloved: yourself. You need some quality time too.
Be excellent to yourselves.
.
.
.
.
My next post will be going live on Feb. 26th, 2020.
As of right now, blog posts will be biweekly, on Wednesdays. If you’ve been reading long enough, you’ll know that’s subject to change. I’ll be announcing the date of new posts at the end of each post, the top of the blog home page, my Instagram bio, and Instagram stories. So you can’t miss it!
.
.
Be sure to subscribe so that you are first to know when a new post has gone live!
.
.
Blog: @smalltown.squirrel
Art Page: @thesquirrelshollow
Personal: @sh3rlc3
No comments:
Post a Comment